On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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