Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
