so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
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