just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize