she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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