I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Found your dick twin last night
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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