i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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