I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize