So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
