At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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