i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Randomize
