you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
