Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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