Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
where are my eyebrows?
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