Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She's the barista slut.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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