New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
