if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
