I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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