I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
