i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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