Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
You ate ashes out of my bong
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
