Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
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