just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
