The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
