So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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