It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I need a beard to bite.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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