i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize