Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
