What a fucking waste of an outfit
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
This baby is an asshole
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Randomize
