your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
