I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
