Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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