I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Text me some of your sweat
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
