So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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