if i died would you start the facebook group?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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