Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
