You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
