Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
