He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
