Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
