I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
