Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
