You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
