I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Randomize
