I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
