Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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