i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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