Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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