I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
