nut hugger
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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