I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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