Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
